(Next time, dude, tell your boss “Hell, NO!” when he asks you do this kind of stuff - if there is a next time, that is….)
CAST: Adrian Rawlins, Bernard Hepton, David Dakar, Pauline Moran, Claire Holman.
DIRECTOR: Herbert Wise
WARNING: Some SPOILERS and one really pissed-off ghost - straight ahead…
IT’S LIKE THIS: Ambitious Victorian-era barrister (that’s what the Limeys call a lawyer in England) and family man Arthur Kidd (Adrian Rawlins) is eager to make partner in his law firm, so he accepts a sketchy job assignment from his boss to travel to the tiny hamlet of Crippengifford in the rural north of England. His task: settle the affairs of a recently deceased woman and pack up the shit in her isolated house which, by the way, is called Eelmarsh House. Sorry, folks, but if a house has a name like that, it’s pretty safe to assume that it’s not full of Walt Disney characters wanting to sing and dance to you. Sure enough, Arthur learns of the legend of the “woman in black” - the spirit of a woman who died while really, really, really pissed off. This set off a curse that ensures anyone who encounters her ghost is pretty much fucked - no matter where they hide. Good luck with that, Arthur.
THE DUDE (OR DUDETTE) MOST LIKELY TO SAVE THE DAY: Arthur seems pretty resolute and resourceful - but it may not be enough to escape the curse of the Woman In Black…
EYE CANDY MOST LIKELY TO FIRE UP A WOODY: Adrian Rawlins as Arthur Kidd. All lawyers should be this HAWT!!!.
MOST INTENTIONALLY SCARY SCENE: Shit, where do I start? The part where Arthur feels the hairs stand up on the back of his neck - then turns to see La Donne En Nero standing there looking like someone stole her ice cream cone? Or the part where Arthur hears the ghostly re-enactment of a stagecoach crash, with a kid screaming like someone stole his ice cream cone. Or how about the part in the inn room where El Mujer En Negro gets the jump on Arthur? Or how about the scene at the very end of the film where Arthur and his family enjoy a nice boating excursion, thinking they’re safe, only to have our fashionably-dressed banshee show up unexpectedly? Any one of these scene may test the strength of your bowels.
MOST UNINTENTIONALLY SCARY SCENE: They’re all intentionally scary. All of ‘em. No false moves or mis-steps here.
HOTTEST SCENE: Adrian Rawlins in his longjohns. And in his shirt unbuttoned down to there. And with sweat running down his face and neck. And rubbing his blond stubble out of frustration. God, I need to get laid.
INQUIRING MINDS WANT TO KNOW: What the hell really happened at Eelmarsh house? Who died in that mysterious stage-coach crash? What is the real identity of the Woman in Black? What does she want? Will Arthur be able to escape her wrath? Or is he pretty much fucked? Why is she so pissed off, anyway? Is it because of the dark circles under her eyes? Arthur should teach her how to use concealer and see if that mellows her out.
WHY YOU SHOULD WATCH “THE WOMAN IN BLACK”: If you like period horror films that are truly frightening.
WHY YOU MAY NOT ENJOY “THE WOMAN IN BLACK”: If you don’t like being scared. And if you don’t like period movies.
FINAL ANALYSIS: Based on Susan Hill’s popular novella, THE WOMAN IN BLACK is a singularly powerful ghost story that is so effective that it was a hugely successful play before it was turned into this equally accomplished television movie. Now, it is being remade again for a 2012 big-screen release starring Harry Potter himself (Daniel Radcliffe) as the lawyer Arthur Kidd who gets pulled into the Woman in Black’s sinister web. This version has an older version of Arthur, as essayed very well by Adrian Rawlins. Rawlins delivers a rich, layered performance that sees Arthur as a devoted family man and dedicated barrister whose experiences in Eelmarsh house gradually strip of logic and reason - until the only thing left is raw, primal fear. As with the best haunted house flicks, THE WOMAN IN BLACK is thick with dread, foreboding, and moody atmosphere. It also has whopper of an ending that you won’t see coming - nor forget anytime soon. You’ll see.
They say horror films and thrillers are only as strong as their villains, and the Woman in Black is indeed a formidable supernatural adversary. The various images of the Woman In Black on the horizon, silently watching, deserves to be an iconic one. Predating the relentless, implacably vengeful ghosts of THE RING and THE GRUDGE, the ghost of THE WOMAN IN BLACK was definitely ahead of her time. Unlike the ghosts of THE CHANGELING and WHAT LIES BENEATH that just wanted justice, peace, and to be laid to rest, the ghost of Eelmarsh House just wants to ensnare anyone she can in her web of rage. And there’s nothing more frightening that, because how do you stop it? The answer (or lack of) is why THE WOMAN IN BLACK is an unforgettably terrifying experience. And I can’t wait for the big-screen version with Daniel Radcliffe to hit theatres next year.
